To my churchmates

Last year, I suddenly left church. I think this shocked a lot of you, judging from the response I got. I guess I’m finally ready to talk about this decision in public.

I had my own reasons to leave. I hated coming to this church. I heard that things have changed, but there were both internal and external reasons which drove me out of church. And up till now, the problems have not yet been solved.

I visited the Notre Dame today and service was going on. A strong wave of nostalgia suddenly crashed onto me. I realized that I miss being part of a church, a group of brothers and sisters in Christ who seek to praise and worship Him together. I also want to attend service again, and Holy Communion.

But that’s not going to happen. At least not now, and not for this church.

When the three men started singing, their mellow voices under the beautiful church acoustics made me tear up. How I miss standing up there, singing praises to the Lord and delivering His messages to the congregation through His music. How I wish I can go back to those times.

I want you all to understand that I miss church. And I want to be there to learn 三福, to sing in GYC, to attend youth camp etc. It’s just that things are very complicated at the moment and I need some time to figure them out.

I’ve never forgotten about this church. Every time I pass by Shell, I’ll catch a glimpse of this church again, simply because of my sheer love for it. This church holds so many memories I still keep close to my heart.

I want to see you all again.

I promised that I will come back. And I will find a way to do so.

28/12

1. Finally reconnected with Tao Ran again ˆᴗˆ The happiest thing I’ve experienced for this entire trip HAHA. Even happier than when I first watched snowfall this morning in Luzern of Switzerland ^^

2. My travel log is a bit fail HAHA. Well I’ll be able to tell more stories irl bah :P My tour guide and driver are both very humorous and cute heehee ^^ Just one thing I didn’t like about this trip is that my parents didn’t allow me to buy expensive gifts but only cheap but useless souvenirs that u all don’t want right…? I agree that the cost of living is higher here but I’m only buying gifts for two ppl and souvenirs for the rest which is very reasonable imo.

3. Finally finished reading Tao Ran’s novel and I must say that I really love his writing style (I’ve told him so many times but I’m still going to say teehee) OMGOSH. I love how he developed many characters in the story and set the scenes really well with his superb descriptive abilities. The story was very motivational for me ^^

4. On the way to Paris from France and I’m pretty excited because it means there’s a possibility of WiFi HAHA. (I was really shocked when I knew the Switzerland hotel didn’t have complimentary WiFi. I mean, Switzerland, my fav country out of all places?!?) I think I still have jet lag cuz I’m still waking up at 5am when the morning call is like 7am LOL. But hopefully it’ll be okay soon. ˆᴗˆ

Yu Wei is happy today!!
teehee.

Now you see the ugly side of me

Surprisingly calm about this.

Well, very few things last forever. Perhaps God wants to torture (or train) me using all these unfortunate events. But nothing is going to bring me down again, because I’m so experienced with all these shit.

Stop blaming others for your own stupid problems
And when have u ever taken any responsibility

To my bestie

I live in the past.

Past experiences have made me the fearful and fatalist person I am today. I don’t like who I am now, because I’m hesitant to receive support and I question people’s motives in attempting to come closer to me.

I want to be free. I want to live out my dreams. I want to love again, and I want to receive love. I want to appreciate the support I am given and not just reject it. I want to believe in the people around me again.

I’m currently at a stage where I need to make many major decisions in life. I need to decide how much failure and disappointment I can take, if my decisions turn out to be disastrous.

What I need is someone who seeks to understand my struggles and respects whatever decision I make in the end. I need this person to tell me that no matter what happens, I won’t be dealing with the outcome alone, and that we’ll find a way out together.

I think I’ve found this someone. I’m so blessed to have you by my side. ˆᴗˆ

I hate WordPress.

1. You take away all my paragraphing
2. There are so little blogskins
3. The website is so hard to use
4. You screw up my posts.

Like NOW. OMGOSH. I re-typed my previous post a few times but u choose to continue to omit the stuff u don’t like. I just wanted to update my readers about my Europe trip. Is it that difficult to just cooperate???

I’m sorry for being so pissed off now because I’m having severe jet lag (which I mentioned in my previous post but obviously this part got conveniently removed by the system) and my eyes hurt and I’m feeling dizzy. I’m also using a portable charger to charge my phone which is extremely dumb because I hate using portable chargers. SO MUCH. I hate that we have to use a universal adapter here. And I simply don’t get to use it.

Post As trip #1

Day 1 – Singapore to London

I love Changi Airport. It’s so prettaye < Met my bro after these few months ˆᴗˆ Had a great dinner in Novotel that day ^^

Day 2 – London to Amsterdam

Took a ferry to Amsterdam! It was a huge ferry and there were a lot of shops like Accessorize and some makeup shops but didn't manage to go into the shops to take a look :( Saw lots of pretty angmoh girls <333 HAHA. One angmoh baby kept staring at me while I was eating my lunch LOL so cuteee. Ate some McKroket burger thing at Macs which was quite nice, but I totally didn't come all the way to Europe just to eat Macs man.

Day 3 – Amsterdam to Cologne

Can you all believe that we ate Macs again??? OMGOSH I never want to eat Macs for the rest of my life :'( The only good thing about Macs today was the WiFi teehee. And during lunch we were kinda separated by a glass + metal wall from my bro and my mum so Pa Pa and I had a nice chat about economics and football HAHA. My room toilet that night was a bit scary cuz the shower cubicle was separated from the rest of the toilet (like an extension) and it was unusually dark…

Day 4 – Cologne to Munich

Took the Rhine River Cruise today and finally managed to drink some local wine (both white and red!!! YAYYY) heehee. The old fortification walls were really beautiful and the castles were very pretty too < Will try to post again asap k!

16/12

Feeling guilty for not posting for so long so here goes :P

1. Played Pokemon Sapphire on some online website ytd and today and managed to trash all the gym leaders and trainers MUAHAHA. As usual I like to have Zigzagoon around because it will help me collect a lot of random but useful stuff like super potion teehee ^^ But I think I got too excited or something when playing the game and accidentally closed the window this morning and there goes all the hard work I have put in LOL

2. Set up my ”slow :)” room as usual on Audition and I’m playing 130 bpm nowadays. My room was filled up really fast for some reason then after a few songs I disconnected and they proceeded on to play without me :'( then when I came back the new DJ was some person at a really high level and he played some 188 bpm song by KJK. I think it was Loveable. I got a shock and just gave up HAHA. Luckily someone had the heart to help me ask for my DJ rights back YAYYY. Then the same 188 bpm guy started to have a super long and flirtatious convo with this girl, delaying the starting of the game. I mean if u all want to talk then get out of my room OMGOSH. Did u all even see the title of the room before u all entered???

3. I’m currently waiting for Sarah to help me buy my food HAHA. Gonna go Kbox later YIPPEE ^^ I’m so excited! And tmr I’m table tennis-ing with Kia Yee LALALA~

– AFTER KBOX –

4. Had a pretty awesome day with the sweet Sarah <333 I'm happy cuz I sang quite a lot of 小猪's songs HAHA. And Sarah decided to learn 败给你 so we can duet next time LOL. It's such a fun song teehee ^^ Missed spending time with my dear sister ˆᴗˆ

4. Btw just to update u guys, I'm leaving for UK on 19 Dec and coming back on 3 Jan ˆᴗˆ Will try to do something that I've never done before which is to post pictures of my trip on this blog teehee ^^ Hope my travel diary plan will succeed HAHA